ICP (INSANE CLOWN POSSE) - THE DATING GAME LYRICS
Artist: Icp (Insane Clown Posse) Lyrics
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Host: lets meet contestan number 1, he's a skitzophranic serial killer clown
who says women love his sexy smile. Let's find out if his charm will work on
Sharon. Sharon, what's your question?
Sharon: Contestant number1, i believe first impressions last forever. So lets
say you were to come over to my parent's house and have dinner with me and my
family, tell me what you'd do to make that first impression really stick.
Contestant #1: Let's see... well i'd have to think about it. I might show up in
a tux ha but i doubt it. I'd probably just show up naked like I always do, and
look your mama in the eye and tell her fuck you! Hurry up bitch i'm hungry, I
smell spaghetti, i pinch her LOOPY ass and tell her get the food ready. Your
dad would probably start trippin' and get me pissed, I'd have to walk up and
bust him in his fuckin' lip. It's dinner time, we're hearin' grace from your
mother i'd pull a forty out and pour some for your little brother. I'm steady
starin' at your sister, I'll tell you this, you know for only 13 she got some
big tits! After that, your dad would try to TRIP again, and only this time I'd
put the 40 to his chin. After your mom does the dishes and the silverware, I'd
DRY fuck her till i nut in my underwear...
(applause and laughter)
Host: Now lets meet Contestant number 2. He's a psychopathic deranged crackhead
freak who works for the dark carnival. He says women call him stretch nutz.
Sharon let's here your question.
Sharon: I like a man who's not afraid to show his true emotion, a man who
expresses himself in his own special way. Number 2, if you fell in love with
me, exactly how would you let me know?
Contestant #2: First thing, I could never love you. You sound like richey bitch
yo Fuck You! but if i did, I'd probably show you that i care by takin' all
these other mothafuckers outta here. I'd go through your phone book and wack
'em all, then find Contestant number 1 and break his fuckin jaw (what!?).
Anyone who looked at you would have to pay. I'd be blowin' fuckin nuggets off
all day. I'd grab your titties, and stretch 'em down past your waist, let 'em
go and watch 'em both spring up in your face. I'd sing love songs to ya the
best I can, get ya naked and hit like a Cave Man! Then we go to the beach and
walk through the sand i throw a little in your face and say i'm just playin'.
as you spit it all out I rub your back and grab your underwear and wedge it up
your ass crack!
(applause and laughter)
Host: Well it sounds like Contestant number 2 is just overflowing with
sensitivity Sharon. It's a tough choice so far. Sharon lets have your last
question and see which one is gonna win the rights to your neden
Sharon: Ok, if we were at a dance club and you both noticed me at the same
time, tell me, how would you each get my attention and what would your pick up
line be? Whoever's the smoothest wins!!
C#1: Ok, first, I'd slide up to the bar and tell you that I can't believe how
fucking fat you are. I'd tell you that I like the way you make your titties
shake and if you lost a little weight you'd look like Rikki Lake
C#2: Fuck That! You'd be jackin' me quick. I'd order you a drink and stir it
with my dick, and then to get your attention in a crowded place, I'd simply
walk up and stick my nuts in your face.
C#1: Yeah freak her with your nuts yo that'll get her
C#2: Tell her that she's fat, yeah that'll work even better
C#1: Look, fuck you, i got a strong RAP shit you don't want Contestant number 2
he's mad whack, I walked into a barn and there he was, standing UP on a bucket
(uhhhh) tryin' to fuck it, it was a big fucking smelly ass farm LLAMA
C#2: Damn dawg! How ya gonna dis your mama??
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