Artist: Tim Wilson
Song Title: Garth Brooks Ruined My Life
What's the big deal about Garth Brooks
What's he got that I ain't got
Except the biggest country album in history
And girls screamin' in the parking lot
My wife thinks Garth Brooks hung the moon
Yeah she thinks Garth's number one
And there's even husbands jealous at Garth Brooks over in Ireland.
I look better in a hat than he does
And I got a lot more hair
I missed The Dance, Still Felt the Pain
And I've never had an Answered Pray
I wrote a hundred songs about rodeos
But my wife wouldn't listen to mine
Now I'm singin' to Friends in a place so Low
Garth Brooks couldn't even find.
Garth Brooks you better hope we never meet
Or one of us is gonna get hurt
Yeah you'll let go of that Longneck Bottle
If I choke you with a Garth Brooks T-shirt
She has taken down our weddin' pictures
And put a poster of you
And if your name comes up again when she's sleepin'
There's no tellin' what I'll do.
Yeah we went though this a few years ago
When she was dreamin' about George Strait
But now the name Garth Brooks are two words
I have grown to hate
Brother you look like a cowboy airport controller
With that ugly little microphone
Why don't you quit tryin' to turn my wife away
And leave my life alone.
I sick of, Garth Brooks
I'm tired of hearin' about, Garth Brooks
I think I've had enough, Garth Brooks
My wife is in love with, Garth Brooks
She wants to be Mrs., Garth Brooks
I hope his records sells like, Garth Brooks