American Cheese Album

Artist(s): Nerf Herder

Tracklist

Welcome to My World

length: 2:07

Sittin in my boxers, eating AppleJacks
Welcome to my world, welcome to my world; ohh
Wacking off to late night Cinamax
welcome to my world, welcome to my world
Yagar mister and captain crunch, nicotine and the brady bunch
building aboat out of pudding cups
Welcome to my world, welcome to my world

no stop no go action, without you
This old shirt is starting to stink
I don't give a damn what people think
I can take a leak in the kitchen sink

welcome to my world

now you needed sheed a tear
because i got waffles and i got beer
and i've got Mr.Belvadear

Welcome to my world, welcome to my world
no stop no go action, without you
yeah

don't want to be here,
don't want to be here tonight
can't stand another epsiode of Cheers tonight
I hate Loney, i hate Diane
Fraiser and Normad, and that dumbass mail man

High Five Anxiety

length: 3:07
High five anxiety, high five anxiety
don't raise your hand and
don't look at me
high five anxiety, high five anxiety
i'm not your bro and i'll never be
don't wanna play on your team, in your game
the last one picked
"hey loser, hey loser!" that's my name
don't talk to me, don't talk to me
don't talk to me, don't talk to me
don't talk to me...
walking down the street
can't figure out which side to pass on left or right
can't merge on the freeway
don't know (?) where to go
when you see me there
please don't try to hug me
makin me cry
don't know how to deal...or did i say too much?
don't wanna play on your team, in your game
the last one picked
"hey loser, hey loser!" that's my name
don't talk to me, don't talk to me
don't talk to me, don't talk to me
don't talk to me...
don't want your hate
don't want your lies
don't want your hot apple pies
don't want your hugs
don't want your smooch
just stay away
you fucking kook
don't talk to me...

New Wave Girl

length: 2:54
I've got a new girl
( Tell us what's she like)
An envirenmentalist girl
(Does she ride a bike)
She has a crystal necklace
(She spend a lot of cash)
Though her vibes are wreckless
(She's heading for a crash)
Oh her flowing shirt is blowing in a transcendental wind
and she wonders without knowing where did she begin
Mary Moon she's a vegitarian
Mary Moon Mary Moon Mary Moon
Mary Moon will outlive all the septuagenarins
Mary Moon Mary Moon Mary Moon
Oh she's loves me so
She hates to be alone
She don't meat
But she sure like the bone
RAH
You knew she drives a windcar
(How does she like it)
It doesn't get her to far
(Why doesn't she bike it)
But it gets to where she's going to
(I don't know I dont't know I don't know)
Where that is I wish I knew
I don't know where she's going
and I don't know where she's been
All I know that loving her has got to be a sin
CHORUS

Mr. Spock

length: 3:30
You want a guy who can bring the Bacon
And you want a guy with Savoir Faire
Somebody who can take control of it
Someone with cool black shiny hair
(YEAH!)

You don't want a boyfriend
What you want is Mr. Spock
To come to your wasteland
And destroy the roh-oh-oh-oh-oh-bot
Something more than human
Someone with blood that's cold and green
You want something better... than me

Captain Kirk went to the planet *laser sound*
And there he fought the man-lizard
He saved the ship, invented the gunpowder
But that's just not good enough for you, is it?!
Noooooooo!

You don't want a boyfriend
What you want is Mr. Spock
To come to your wasteland
And destroy the roh-oh-oh-oh-oh-bot
Something more than human
Someone with blood that's cold and green
You want something better than meeee..meeeee....

You sit all night at your computer
Drinking Diet Dr. Pepper
Looking for an answer to it all....
Say the words! Say the words! Say! Say! Say the words!

You don't want a boyfriend
What you want is Mr. Spock
To come to your wasteland
And destroy the roh-oh-oh-oh-oh-bot
Something more than human
Someone with blood that's cold and green
You want something better than meeeee... meeeeee... than me!

Jacket

length: 3:01
When you borrowed it that night
You wore my jacket for the last time
The jacket used to be our history
Now its only covered with your cold memory

So much time I spent with you now
Now all that's left are tears from falling off your bed
Marks made by your sleeping head
Lipstick from a drunken kiss
Ice cream stains that now I miss

I read the band names on the clothes
GBH, Black Flag and Dr. Know
I saw the Devo patch on your sleeve
And you were in my jacket without me

So much time I spent with you now
Now all that's left are tears from falling off your bed
Marks made by your sleeping head
Lipstick from a drunken kiss
Ice cream stains that now I miss

Blood from when you scraped your cheek
That dirt from walking by the creek
Coffee spilled on our first date
I used to let you wear it in the rain

So much time I spent with you girl
Now all that's left are tears from falling off your bed
Marks made by your sleeping head
Lipstick from a drunken kiss

Ice cream stains that now I miss
You used to wear it in the rain

Rock City News

length: 2:07
Don't stop believin'
That you can't do nothin'
Get yourself a second-hand guitar and set the world on fire
Any old axe will do, anything but a Squire

Rock City News
You gotta pay your dues
At the Rock City News
If you want to sing the blues

Living on a wing and prayer
Out on the strip, nobody cares
Scabbing off a valley chick
Sleeping on the practice room the floor
Pretty soon the record company will be banging on your door

Rock City News
You gotta pay your dues
At the Rock City News
If you want to sing the blues, Dave!

Yeah, aw, yeah!

Rock city News
You gotta pay your dues
At the Rock City News
If you want to pay to lose

Like drinkin' booze
You know it ain't no ruse
Put on your dancing shoes
And stick an ad in the Rock City News
The Rock City News

Cashmere

length: 2:38
All alone in your pajamas
Writing letters to your grandma
She doesn't understand what's wrong with kids today
Things were better back in 1938

You go to school, you do the homework
Extra credit - But you still feel like a jerk
Second captain of the debating club
You've got the GPA, but where is the dirty love?
It's not right
Your by yourself on a Friday night
Lost and alone
You gotta bark if you want the bone

Put your hands on my cashmere sweater
My cashmere sweater
Put your hands on my cashmere sweater
Don't it make you feel better?

You drive your friend to the rock show
You've got suspicions that she's kind of a ho
She disappears with the drummer
Your sitting on the curb
What a bummer!

It's not fair
Your dying, and no one seems to care
Take, Take a stand
Put down the pencil case and take my hand

Put your hands on my cashmere sweater
My cashmere sweater
Put your hands on my cashmere sweater
Don't it make you feel better?

Come to me
I'm warm and fuzzy
Come to me
I'm warm and fuzzy
Come to me
I'm warm and fuzzy
Come to me
I'm warm and fuzzy



Nervous Breakdown

length: 2:48
Nervous breakdown, come take me away
Nervous breakdown, cafeteria today
I fell down on the floor, oh god I spilt my milk
Someone pull up my pants I think I need some help

Now I can't believe that I'm fallin'
No I can't believe I'm fallin' again
Will you visit me at the bottom
Yeah I'm fallin', gonna give the devil his due

Nervous breakdown, doc what should I do?
Never fall in love with a girl from B.Y.U.
She came in the record store and I fell down in the stall
Those Salt Lake city girls play kick ass basketball

Now I can't believe that I'm fallin'
No I can't believe I'm fallin' again
Will you visit me at the bottom
Yeah I'm fallin', gonna give the devil his due

Put the needle down
Put the needle down
Put the needle down
Put the needle down
Put the needle down
Put the needle down
Put the needle down
Put the needle, needle down

Jenna Bush Army

length: 3:07
There's a new leader in the land
With a platform I understand
I saw her face in the magazine
She looks hot in her tight jeans

Keep marching on
Solider of love
Jenna Bush army (you can't stop her)
Jenna Bush army!

She's got the brains and the looks that kill
Want to see her butt on a ten dollar bill
Ready your vote for her ballot box
You've got to admit it, she's a fox

Keep marching on
Solider of love
Jenna Bush army (you can't stop her)
Jenna Bush army, yeah!

I don't care who blows up the world
I only care about that girl
Men of America, storm the election
When in doubt follow your erection
Call up your congressman and say quote:
"Sir I'm horny and I vote!"
Come ye rally round the flag
If you don't like her you must be a fag!

Jenna Bush army
Jenna Bush army!

Yeah!

Jenna (Jenna)
Jenna (Jenna)
Jenna (Jenna)
Jenna (Jenna)

Bush!
Bush!
Bush!
Bush!
Bush!
Bush!
Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush!

Defending the Faith

length: 3:07
Long ago, we watched the videos
On Headbanger's Ball
That's where we learned it all

Wearing spandex pants
Six-string lazers in their hands
Synchrenized guitars
They layed out the master plan, yeah!

Defending the faith
Keep fighting forever
Fighting so hard,
Fighting so long,
Victory will be ours!

Defending the faith
We'll never surrender
Fighting so hard,
Fighting so long,
Victory will be ours!

Sitting on our beds
Hair helmets on our heads
We've got no time for chicks
We're practicing our licks

We come from Albany
Anchorage, and Milwaukee
Toldeo, Bowling Green
All wanting the same dream

Defending the faith
Keep fighting forever
Fighting so hard,
Fighting so long,
Victory will be ours!

Defending the faith
We'll never surrender
Fighting so hard,
Fighting so long,
Victory will be ours!

Wooah! Wooah! Wooah! Wooah!
Wooah! Wooah! Wooah! Woooooooah!

Now I am man
I'm playing in a band
We drive around the world
In our rental van

We're coming to your town
To help you party down
But we'll be gone tomorrow night
Because we'll never stop the fight, yeah!

Woooooooooooooooooooooah!

Defending the faith
Keep fighting forever
Fighting so hard,
Fighting so long,
Victory will be ours!

Defending the faith
We'll never surrender
Fighting so hard,
Fighting so long,
Victory will be ours!

Wooooooooah!
Wooooooooah!

Busted

length: 2:19
I was walkin' down Milpas street
Just a-lookin' for something to eat
When I saw you with that guy named Joe
Out in front of Pavlako's
You were standin' really close
You were lookin' up his nose
Couldn't believe what I saw
You let him touch your bra!

Now your busted
Whoa-oa-oa, busted
Whoa-oa-oa, busted
Whoa-o-a-oa, I'm disgusted
You're busted

Then you got into his car
And drove to the trailer park
There he had a little place
And a big fat smile on his face
I snuck up to the window
And watched the entire show
Yeah you went all the way
And now you've go to pay!

Now your busted
Whoa-oa-oa, busted
Whoa-oa-oa, busted
Whoa-o-a-oa, I'm disgusted
You're busted, now!

You know I thought you used to be pretty cool
Then you went away to college, and now you think you're all special and stuff
You think you're too good for me don't you?!


Busted
Whoa-oa-oa, busted
Whoa-oa-oa, busted
Whoa-oa-oa, busted
Whoa-oa-oa, busted
Whoa-oa-oa, busted
Whoa-oa-oa, busted
Whoa-o-a-oa, I'm disgusted
You're busted, now!

New Jersey Girl

length: 4:04
Well I met her at the Trocadero, In Philly
Backstage at the Bloohound show
She said she was from Cherry Hill, Cherry Hill
Through Lips like cherries in the snow

New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
Come on and Rock my world
New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
I wanna Love you
New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
With your crazy fucked up hair
New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
Your wicked awesome

No she didn't talk to Charlie (our old bass player)
And she didn't go off with Steve
Not the cougar, not the cougar
Yeah she took me up to the balcony
Past Kenneth Keith Kallenback
And gave a Yuengling to me

New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
Come on and Rock my world
New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
I wanna Love you
New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
With your crazy fucked up hair
New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
Your wicked awesome

Her brother calls me blowjob
When I call her on the phone
He says, "Hey fuckwad, are you wacking it, are you wacking it?"
"No, but is your sister home?"

New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
Come on and Rock my world
New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
I wanna Love you
New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
With your crazy fucked up hair
New Jersey Girl, New Jersey Girl
Your wicked awesome

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New Jersey Girl

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New Jersey Girl